Friday, March 9, 2012

The Most Sane Relationship Advice You Will Ever Get

For the record, I am by no means an expert on this topic. My qualifications are solely that I read a lot of women's magazines and as I have previously mentioned, enjoy listening to call-in radio shows. I did not stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.  I also haven't really "dated" in more than 10 years, so feel free to take all of this advice with a grain of salt. (Extra points if it's around the rim of a margarita.  It is Friday after all.)

1) Don't stay with a man or woman who treats you poorly.

2) Don't write letters, emails, Facebook messages, or tweets to ex-girlfriends, mothers, sisters, brothers, best friends, or imaginary friends of your new beau.  Especially without his knowledge.

3) If you're upset, be honest about what you're upset about. If you're mad that you and your boyfriend have been dating for two years and he refers to marriage as “the M word” don't blow up at him because he left his dirty glass on top of the refrigerator. I know it’s easy to think that if you bring up these issues you’re being annoying or needy, but it's a lot more annoying when a guy thinks you're psycho because you're totally OCD about dishes.

4) Get a Life. It's not fair to expect someone else to be solely responsible for your happiness. Have your own hobbies, interests and friends. Do things that you enjoy. Not only will it help you be a well-rounded and confident human being (which is always appealing) but it will give you more interesting things to talk about than whether your jeans are pacific blue or navy.

5) Don't expect him/her to pay for everything. Don't expect to pay for everything yourself. Find a way to balance money issues so that you're both comfortable. Feeling used is not fun.

6) Don't hack into his/her phone, email, or Facebook. No good will come of it. Promise.

7) Don't let a man speak to you in a way that he wouldn't speak to his mother. If he wouldn’t say "Screw You" to his mother, he shouldn't say it to you.  Don’t let a woman speak to you in a way that she wouldn’t speak to her father.  If she wouldn’t say “Screw You” to her father, she shouldn’t say it to you.

8) As long as you are not behaving in a way that is dangerous to yourself or to others, don't let anyone tell you who you are, how you should act, or what your personality should be.

9) Have inside jokes.

10) Be kind to one another.

11) Fight fair.

12) Don't settle. Not because you're getting close to thirty, or because you like his mother, or because you want to have a baby, or because Valentine's Day is just around the corner, or because moving is such a pain.

If you have any additions, feel free to post them below.  Otherwise, Happy Friday!

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