Hopes and Dreams

Mike and I are 31 and 30 respectively, which seems to be the prime time for making life's big decisions.  Who do you want to marry?  Where do you want to live?  When will you buy a home?  Do you want to have kids?  If so, how many and when do you want to start?  What do you want your career to be and how do you get there?  In your ideal world, would you choose daycare or a nanny or a stay at home parent?

For me (and I think most people) these are some intimidating decisions because as soon as you make them, you're kind of stuck.  If you buy a house and decide that you want to go live on a ranch in Montana, you can't just pack up and go on a whim.  If you have children, it's probably not realistic to quit your steady job as an investment banker and become a yoga instructor.  If you get married, you are promising to make decisions jointly on anything and everything important.  In some ways making these decisions means that you are locking in your life.

Of course, if you don't make any of these decisions you will end up living alone in a box on a beach somewhere with no home, family, or job, so I guess that's not a very realistic life path either.  It just seemed easier in my 20's.  It was totally reasonable to try a job for a year and quit and try something totally different if you didn't like it.  You could pick a guy to date and not have to automatically wonder if you could see yourself raising babies with them.  You could decide to pack up your whole life and move on a whim to a city you have never been to but always found appealing, and if you ended up crashing on a friend's (or your parents') couch for a few weeks, no one would judge you for it.

Now the stakes are higher.  The decisions are more important.  And while I certainly don't think that 30 is old and it's never too late to make changes in your life or do the right thing, the time is now to figure out who you want to be, where you want to be it, and who you want to be it with.

I guess all we can do is have faith, say our prayers, talk to our loved ones, and when the time comes--take the leap.  You only live once, afterall, and I'd rather not live in a box on the beach.